Why Employees Turn Down International Moves, and the Family Support That Changes Their Answer
Last checked: September 2026. Survey figures are updated every year and immigration rules for partners change often. Treat figures as a starting point for your own research.
You have the right person for the role abroad. The salary is agreed, the post is important, and the timing works for the organisation. Then the answer comes back: "Thank you, but I can't move my family right now."
This is one of the most common and most costly moments in international mobility. It is also one of the most preventable. In most cases, the employee is not saying no to the job. They are saying no to what the move would do to their partner's career, their children's schooling or their responsibilities at home. When organisations deal with those worries early and practically, many of those answers change.
This guide is written for HR teams, global mobility managers and people managers in NGOs, development agencies, embassies, multinationals and international schools. It covers what the data says, the real reasons behind a "no", which kinds of support make the biggest difference, and how to build a family support package that fits your budget.
What does the data say about employees declining relocation?
The clearest recent figures come from the 2026 Atlas Corporate Relocation Survey. Atlas Van Lines surveyed 549 decision-makers at companies that relocate staff, mostly in the United States, between December 2025 and January 2026. Most of these moves are within one country, so the numbers are not a perfect picture of international postings. But the direction is useful, and it matches what international surveys have found for years.
- 59% of companies had employees decline a relocation, and 46% said more employees declined in 2025 than before.
- Family issues or ties were the top reason, named by 34% of companies.
- Housing worries came next: concerns about housing or a mortgage at the new location (28%) and about selling or leaving the home they already have (21%).
- For the first time, the survey listed taking children out of school or moving them to a new school as a separate reason. It went straight into the top five.
For international moves, the partner's career is the other big factor. The Permits Foundation, a non-profit that works on work permits for expatriate partners, surveyed 730 accompanying partners of 67 nationalities in 2022. It found:
- 53% of partners were not working in the host country.
- 84% of those who were not working wanted to work.
- Only 20% had discussed their employment concerns with their partner's employer.
- 94% said countries that let partners work are more attractive places to move to.
Earlier research points the same way. A 2018 study by NetExpat and EY, which included HR representatives, employees and partners, reported that employers see the potential disruption to the relocating partner's career as the number one reason employees turn down an international assignment.
Housing adds pressure too. A 2025 global mobility survey by the Canadian Employee Relocation Council (CERC) with Ipsos, covering more than 10,500 working professionals in 19 countries, found that 57% of organisations had trouble securing housing for international transfers, and 76% of employees would look to their employer for help with temporary housing.
The message is simple. People rarely decline a move because of the job. They decline because of the family around the job.
What are the real reasons employees say no?
"Family reasons" is a label, not an explanation. When you look closer, it usually breaks down into a handful of specific worries. Each one needs a different kind of support.
The partner's career
This is often the biggest reason, and the least discussed. The partner may have to give up a job, a client base or years of progress towards promotion. In some countries they cannot legally work on a dependant visa. In others they can, but the local job market or language makes it hard. A partner who fears losing their income and professional identity will often, quietly, make the final decision. For the legal side by country, see can your partner work there?
Schools
Parents worry about finding a place, about the cost, about the curriculum and about the move breaking up their child's education. International schools often have waiting lists, and applications for the next school year usually open in the autumn before. A family asked to move in six weeks may simply not be able to find a school place in time. Our guide to the international school applications timeline explains the calendar families face.
Children's ages
Age matters a great deal. Families with babies and toddlers worry about childcare and healthcare. Families with children in the last two or three years of secondary school worry about exams and university entry, because switching curriculum at 16 can be very disruptive. Teenagers may also say no themselves, and parents take that seriously.
Elderly or unwell parents
Many mid-career employees are caring for ageing parents, or expect to soon. Being a long flight away when a parent falls ill is a real fear. Flexibility on home leave and emergency travel can matter more here than any allowance.
Healthcare
Families need to know that a child with asthma, a pregnancy or a long-term condition can be managed safely at the new post. Where local care is limited, they want to know about medical insurance, evacuation cover and the nearest good hospital.
Safety and security
For postings in fragile or high-risk places, safety is often the first question. Families want clear, honest information about the security situation, where people live, how children get to school, and what the organisation's security plan looks like.
Housing
Families worry about finding a safe, suitable home near a school and within the housing allowance. They also worry about what happens to their home in the origin country: selling it, renting it out or leaving it empty.
What support actually changes an employee's answer?
Not every benefit carries the same weight. The support that changes minds tends to answer one of the worries above directly. These are the measures that come up again and again, and why each one matters.
A look-see trip for the family
A short visit before the decision, ideally with the partner and, where practical, the children. Seeing the schools, a few neighbourhoods and a supermarket turns an unknown place into a real one. Many families decide during this trip. If you only pay for the employee to go, you leave the partner deciding from photographs.
School search support
Practical help identifying suitable schools, understanding admissions and securing a place. Some organisations pay application or registration fees, or hold relationships with schools at regular posting locations. Clear rules on what school fees are covered, and for which years, remove a large source of stress.
Partner career support
This can include help with work permits, job search coaching, introductions to local networks, language courses, funding for retraining or a professional qualification, and permission for the partner to keep working remotely where local law allows. Even a clear conversation about what is possible, early on, makes a difference. Our guide to relocation spouse support goes into the options in more detail.
Flexibility on temporary housing
A fixed number of days in a hotel or serviced apartment often runs out before the family finds a home, especially in tight rental markets. Being able to extend temporary housing when needed reduces the pressure to sign the first lease they see.
Language training
Language lessons for the whole family, not just the employee. For the partner, language is often what makes local friendships, work and everyday life possible.
Settling-in and destination services
Help with the first practical steps: registering with local authorities, opening a bank account, getting a phone, finding a doctor, understanding the neighbourhood. This can come from a destination services provider, a colleague who acts as a local contact, or clear written guidance.
Family orientation
A briefing that covers daily life, culture, safety and health for the whole family, not only the employee. In the development and diplomatic sectors this is sometimes offered to employees only. Including partners, and older children where it makes sense, helps the whole family arrive with realistic expectations.
Check-ins at 30, 60 and 90 days
Many problems appear after the boxes are unpacked: an isolated partner, a child struggling at school, a housing problem. Short, planned conversations at 30, 60 and 90 days after arrival give the family a safe moment to raise issues before they become reasons to leave. Ask about the family, not only about work.
From experience: In our experience, support usually stops at paying for a container and the partner's visa. The shipment and the paperwork are covered. Everything that decides whether a family settles, such as the partner's work, schools, and the first months of everyday life, is usually left to the family to work out alone.
What does family support cost compared with a declined or failed move?
Family support is not free, and budgets are under pressure. AIRINC's 2026 benchmark on long-term assignments notes that full "balance sheet" packages are more and more used only for strategic assignments. So it is fair to ask whether family support is worth the money.
The best way to answer is to compare it with the cost of the alternatives.
- A declined move. You go back to your second-choice candidate, restart recruitment, or leave the post empty for months. The work that depended on that person is delayed.
- A failed assignment. A report by International SOS, with analysis by KPMG, estimated in 2024 that a failed international assignment can cost up to USD 1.25 million. That figure is based on the compensation, relocation, ongoing support and tax costs of a representative long-term assignment, so it reflects a large corporate package. For an NGO or a school the number will be much lower, but the principle holds: most of the money is spent before anyone knows the move will fail.
- A move that does not fail but does not work well. The employee stays but spends months managing a family crisis. This cost is rarely measured, but most managers have seen it.
Against this, many of the most effective family measures are modest: a partner on the look-see trip, a few weeks of extra temporary housing, a language course, a school search service, a career coaching budget, and three structured conversations. These are small items compared with a salary and a shipment.
We have not found a reliable, independent study that puts a single number on how much family support reduces failure rates. Be cautious of any source that quotes one precise figure. What the surveys do show clearly is where the problems come from: the family.
What should a family support package include at different budgets?
The table below is a practical starting point, not a benchmark. Adapt it to your organisation, your posting locations and local law. Many organisations use a "core plus flexible" approach: a fixed core for everyone and a flexible budget families can spend on what matters most to them. KPMG's 2022 Global Assignment Policies and Practices survey found that 52% of participating organisations already use core and flexible provisions.
| Area | Lower budget | Medium budget | Higher budget |
|---|---|---|---|
| Before the decision | Honest written briefing on the post, schools, housing and partner work rights; call with a colleague already there | Look-see trip for employee and partner | Look-see trip for the whole family, with school visits and house viewings arranged |
| Schools | List of schools, admissions calendar, clear policy on fees | School search support; application fees paid | Full education consultant; fees covered; support for children with additional learning needs |
| Partner career | Clear information on work permits; permission to work remotely where legal | Career coaching or job search support; language course | Flexible career budget for retraining, qualifications or starting a business; network introductions |
| Housing | Fixed temporary housing, with a simple way to request a short extension | Flexible temporary housing; home-finding support | Full home search service; help with the home left behind (renting it out or sale support) |
| Language and culture | Online language app or self-study materials for the family | Language lessons for employee and partner | Lessons for the whole family; cultural orientation for partner and older children |
| Settling in | Written arrival guide; named local contact or "buddy" | Destination services for registration, banking and healthcare | Full settling-in programme, including childcare search |
| Wellbeing and follow-up | Check-ins at 30, 60 and 90 days that include the family | Access to an employee assistance programme for the whole family | Family support contact throughout the posting; support planning the move home |
| Family at home | Clear home leave policy | Emergency travel for a parent's illness or death | Extra home leave for employees with caring responsibilities |
Most of the lower budget column costs time rather than money. For how a standard corporate move works from the employee's side, see how corporate relocation works.
How do you talk to employees about their family early?
Many organisations avoid asking about family because it feels private, or because they worry about discrimination. That concern is valid: decisions about who is offered a post should not be based on whether someone has a partner or children. But you can offer every candidate the same open conversation about what they would need to make a move work. Check your approach with your legal or HR policy team.
Some practical ways to do this:
- Talk before the offer is final. The earlier you know about a school deadline or a partner's notice period, the more you can do about it.
- Invite the partner. Offer a separate conversation with the partner, or a joint one. Only 20% of partners in the Permits Foundation survey had discussed their employment concerns with the employer.
- Ask open questions. "What would need to be true for this move to work for your household?" works better than "Do you have any family issues?"
- Be honest about the post. Families trust organisations that are clear about the hard parts: limited work options for partners, a small school market, security restrictions. Overselling a posting leads to early returns.
- Put the support in writing. A clear list of what is and is not covered helps families plan, and reduces disputes later. Employees often use a checklist like our guide on what to ask your employer about a relocation package. It helps to answer those questions before they are asked.
- Give people time. A family needs time to talk, visit and decide. A two-day deadline often produces a "no".
How do you measure whether family support is working?
You do not need a complex system. Start with a few simple measures and track them every year.
- Acceptance rate: how many offered international moves are accepted, and the reasons given when they are not.
- Early returns: how many assignments end earlier than planned, and why.
- Time to settle: how long it takes families to leave temporary housing and have children in school.
- Partner outcomes: whether partners who wanted to work found work, study or a meaningful activity within a year.
- Check-in feedback: what families say at 30, 60 and 90 days, and whether problems raised were solved.
- Extensions and repeat moves: whether employees agree to extend or accept another posting later. This is a strong sign that the family experience was good.
- Exit and return interviews: ask the partner as well as the employee what helped and what was missing.
Compare these measures before and after you make changes. Even in a small organisation, a few years of data will show where families still struggle.
Frequently asked questions
What is the most common reason employees turn down relocation?
Family. In the 2026 Atlas Corporate Relocation Survey, 34% of companies named family issues or ties as the top reason, ahead of housing concerns. For international moves, research consistently points to the partner's career as a major part of that family reason.
Does partner career support really make a difference?
The Permits Foundation's 2022 survey found that 84% of non-working partners wanted to work, and 94% saw countries that allow partners to work as more attractive destinations. Support that helps partners work, study or build something of their own addresses one of the biggest reasons families hesitate.
What is a look-see trip?
A short visit to the new location before the move is agreed, usually a few days. The family visits schools, neighbourhoods and the workplace. Including the partner makes it much more useful, because they are often the one who decides whether the move will work for the household.
How much does a failed international assignment cost?
A 2024 International SOS report, with analysis by KPMG, estimated the cost of a failed international assignment at up to USD 1.25 million, based on a representative long-term corporate package. The real cost varies widely by organisation, role and location.
What is the cheapest support that still makes a difference?
Honest information before the decision, a named local contact, clear rules on schools and home leave, and planned check-ins at 30, 60 and 90 days. These cost mostly time, and they help families feel seen and prepared.
Where to start
You do not need a large budget to change the answer. Start by asking your last few employees who declined a move, or came home early, what would have made the difference. Then look at your current package through the eyes of the partner and the children, not only the employee. The gaps are usually easy to spot.
Supporting families through international postings? The Global Relocation System works with organisations on family relocation support, from the first decision to the first months in a new country. See how we work with organisations and get in touch to talk about your postings.